"Occupation" vrs "Calling"

I struggled for years with the relationship between my "calling" and my "occupation". Growing up, I had always viewed them to be one in the same; thinking that one day my "calling" would provide for me financially, thereby replacing my "occupation". Yet I continued to have absolutely no vision for how these two major arteries of my life would intersect. For many years I was aware of a giftedness that I have in writing as well as a passion for speaking the truth and exhorting my friends in their faith, yet I was unsure how I would or should use this to the glory of God. At the same time I was confused about the many entrepreneurial aspirations that I've had all my life.

A couple of years ago, for the first time in my life, I felt like God told me what my destiny and calling are, "To turn the hearts of man towards God through the power of the pen." That's my official mission here on Earth; but that doesn't necessarily mean that writing is going to pay my bills, so that I can quite my job. So though seeing more of the picture, I was still confused about how all these elements (gifts, aspirations, and purpose) would fit together in my life.

Next I went through a season of feeling really strongly CALLED to launch this website. Over and over I kept hearing God tell me, "Sow what I have given you!" The parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30) kept coming back to mind and again I would hear the call, "Sow what I have given you!"

At that point fear crept into my heart and gave me 100 different reasons NOT to move forward with this project (though it had been on my mind and a desire of my heart for nearly a decade). I started thinking of how much more vulnerable I would be with a whole city scrutinizing every stroke of my pen. Some would love me. Some would hate me. Some would consider me an idiot. Some would question my relationship with God. Some would laugh at my ability to write. Some would scoff at every stroke of my pen.

So reluctantly I started dragging my feet, questioning God about how this was all to pan out. How would this project fit in with my many entrepreneurial aspirations? Was I to quit my job and devote all my time and energy to launching this website? If I did, how could I continue to pay my bills?

Then God brought to my mind the curse of man at "the fall" back in Genesis 3:17-19. "...Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground..."

As a result of our original disobedience and sin, God had created the institution of "work" and commanded us to do it all the days of our life. He didn't tell Adam to work the field because he was "called" to be a farmer. He told Adam to work the field because he and his family needed to eat in order to survive!

I then felt like God was changing my paradigm view of the relationship between "calling" and "occupation". My occupation is the means by which I earn what I need in order to survive (as I am commanded to do). My calling is a destiny that I can choose to fulfill through obedience, which utilizes the gifts that God has given me, and is a way for me to give back to the world (and God) as a result of who God has individually made me. (This is not to say that people are not called into full-time ministry, some absolutely are; but thus far in my life, I am not.)

Then a light bulb came on inside my head, my entrepreneurial aspirations (and other work for hire) are my occupation while writing and publishing Christian media is my calling. It's not a matter of one or the other as I once thought. They are two totally different yet essential elements of the same life; of my life.

If one day in my writing, God takes me to a place where I have the opportunity to write for Him or manage a Christian publication full-time (meaning that the salary would support myself and my family) then that would be awesome! In that instance (most likely) my calling and my occupation would become one in the same. However, I currently don't have anyone willing to write that check, and if I never do then it will still be awesome to know and walk in my calling while enjoying an occupation that I also have great interest in.

For the first time in my life I know who I am, and I know what I'm called to do.